Full Transcript
What do you think of when I say the word intimacy?
You see in our day and age, I think a lot of people think that all intimacy is sexual. They don’t know how to even think about intimacy apart from sexuality. And so singles might be thinking, how do I differentiate? How do I know the difference between when I have sexual desire and really what I’m longing for is intimacy? And I think a few things.
You know, first of all, I do think that there can be some overlap, but probably not as much as you really think. There is. Sexual desire is really more of a physical response, and it can fluctuate based on hormones. It can also fluctuate based on your surroundings if there’s things that are prompting sexual desire or arousal. Whereas a desire for intimacy is really more that sense of, I, I feel lonely. I wanna be seen, I wanna be noticed, I want to be held, I wanna be loved. Now, a lot of times we don’t have the words to use, but you have that feeling of being alone at night. You feel like you’re left out, you feel like no one really knows you, or your life might feel boring or directionless. And so you use sexuality as a way to find connection. You use sexuality as a form of power of getting people’s attention. You know, those really are more desires for intimacy, a desire for connection. And I think it’s really important to learn to differentiate. Like, when is my body just wanting sex and when actually is my soul longing for intimacy? And I really believe if we look biblically or even if we look at culture, you can live without sex, but you can’t live without intimacy. And we really live in a day and age where a lot of things are sabotaging intimacy. We live alone. We use a lot of technology that keeps us from connecting with people. We often move. Those things sabotage intimacy. And often we use sex as a replacement. And my encouragement to you would be to really nurture what it is to have intimate connection with people and relationships. You may even find that your sexual desire isn’t as prominent as it once was.
