Q&A: How do I Respond to my Kid’s Sexual Questions?
Explore additional resources on discipling kids about sexuality.
Java with Juli: #460 How To Have Mini and Many Conversations About Sexuality With Your Kids (this episode is part of our archive and only available to members)
Java with Juli: #507 What You Need To Know About The Gender Conversation
Blog: Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How
Full Transcript
A lot of parents are wondering, how do I respond to my kids’ questions about sex?
Well, first of all, if your kids are asking you questions, then that’s a great start. There are a lot of kids who have these questions, but they don’t feel safe enough to ask their parents, and so we wanna start by opening up an environment of encouraging our kids to talk about sex with us. And that’s often difficult to do because many of us were raised with parents who never talked about it. And so we don’t really know how to, but you really want to look for those teachable moments. Even watching a TV show or movie or if something comes up in the news, make it a table conversation. Talk about what’s happening, and talk about the difference between how the culture presents sex and how the Word of God talks about our sexuality.
And the other thing I would encourage you to do – and this is hard for parents – but try not to create an environment of shame. You know, often when our kids ask questions or they experiment with things, our gut reaction is to tell them that they’re doing something bad. They’re doing something wrong. And that makes them feel like they can’t come to you in a safe way, that you’re just going to shame them even further. And so normalize a kid’s struggle and curiosity about sexuality, but keep having those conversations. You know, one expert said, have mini and many conversations with your kids about sex. Don’t necessarily make it this one big landmark experience, but often have conversations where you’re initiating it, but you’re also responding well to your kids’ questions. Ask them questions. Ask them what they’re learning or what they might be hearing at school. Be brave enough to ask questions about pornography and whether or not they understand what appropriate sexual touch is. These are ways not only to open up the conversation about sex within your family, but also to protect our kids from those who would want to do them harm.
