Have you ever turned to Netflix instead of pursuing sex with your spouse? Have you turned to Instagram instead ending your day by...
Authentic Intimacy
#357: Emotional Safety: What It Is and Why You Need It
What is emotional safety? Look at it this way: an emotionally unsafe relationship is a place where you can’t be yourself. You’re...
#356: Sex & the City of God (What Life Looks Like When We Love God First)
That longing you have to be fully known? God put it there. It’s meant to draw you into intimacy with Him....
#353: Why Telling Your Abuse Story is Complex, Courageous & Healing
Every abuse story has unique layers of complexity and pain. The decision whether or not to tell someone else is often a difficult...
#350: Making Time To Make Love (Especially When You Don’t Feel Like It)
It's hard to prioritize sexual intimacy when you don't understand why God created sex in the first place. Instead, you put up walls...
#345: What You Need to Know About Progressive Christianity
Compassionate. Inclusive. Nonjudgmental. Who wouldn’t want to be part of a church like this? It’s why...
How Do I Recognize an Abusive Marriage?
Ask Anything: Interviews with Experts Dr. Ramona Probasco is a psychologist and a certified domestic abuse counselor. She is also a...
#341: When Staying Married Feels Impossible
Circumstances in Laurie’s life started triggering her memories of childhood sexual abuse. Her lifelong struggle...
#338: Single and Sexual
As a single person, your sexuality isn’t defined by a list of “do's and don’ts” or captured by simplistic questions like, “What does...
#337: Questions You’re Too Embarrassed to Ask About Sex
Dr. Doug Rosenau, a pioneer in Christian sex therapy, has been answering questions about sex for decades—long...
#336: Disappointed With God? Tell Him
Are you discouraged by what is happening in our world today? Have you recently found yourself asking, “Lord, why have you allowed...
#335: Teaching Our Kids a Biblical Worldview of Sexuality
We used to say, "If you don’t talk to your kids about sex, someone else will." These days, there is no more “if” about it! Whether...
#334: What Your Pastor Needs to Know About Porn
In this episode, Juli sits down with Mark & Rosie Makinney to debunk misconceptions about pornography and marriage --many of...
#140: The Story of A Rape Survivor
One of Hettie’s greatest fears was that she would be raped. In her home country of South Africa, it is estimated...
#333: Is God Good …Even if You’re LGBT?
“We are being shaped by a culture that idolizes romantic and sexual fulfillment. And I just think—Jesus was...
#332: Parenting Your Kids Without Shame
In parenting, shame is unavoidable. As a mom or dad, at times you'll likely feel ashamed of how you’re doing as a parent or of how...
#325: BONUS! When Sex Hurts, Pelvic Floor Therapy Can Help
Past trauma, childbirth, a physical fall—just a few of the MANY reasons you might experience painful sex or sexual dysfunction....
#324: Sex Therapy: What Is It, and Why Should You Go?
Online Christian sex therapy—yes, you read that right. Did you know that there are therapists trained specifically to address issues...
#322: The Secret Superpower of Kindness
Think about your toughest relationship: The wife who only ever seems to offer you the cold shoulder. The husband you’re finding it...
#321: Taking Your Marriage Back From Porn
One of the most painful experiences as a wife is learning of your husband’s porn addiction—or learning that...
#318: Why Are We Afraid to Touch?
Let’s face it: As Christians, we’re kind of afraid to touch. Touch feels unsafe and sexual—even...
Java Pack: Conversations that Heal
This Java Pack is a Christian leader’s guide to addressing sexual pain. As Christians, we often spend a lot of time debating what we should believe about sexuality. We may devote some time to ensuring we are personally honoring God with our own sexual choices....
#313: The Greatest Love Story
From beginning to end the Bible tells a story about marriage. Woven through chapter and verse is a story of covenant...
#311: Where Is God When We Suffer?
Sometimes life gets so hard, we doubt that Jesus is still with us. Did he abandon us? Was our faith even real in the...
#310: Is God Sexist?
Is God sexist? Does he value men more than he values women? If you've ever wrestled with this question, a...
Taming the Tongue on Groundhog Day
I’ve heard a lot of people comment that life right now feels like the movie “Groundhog Day”—the same thing over and over again with no end in sight. While there are blessings in having our lives slow down, there are also tensions and frustrations that overflow out of...
Porn Affects You, Even if You Don’t Look At It
The sad truth is that the damage of porn goes far beyond the person consuming it and also affects their relationships, the people in their lives, and culture as a whole.
#222: What’s Your Money Personality?
The two biggest areas of conflict in marriage are sex and money. We talk a lot about sex on Java with Juli, but today we're talking...
Spice Up Your Sex Life
Are you feeling stuck in your home and in your sex life? Think back to the last time you left your house: It could possibly have been four or five weeks! And most likely it has been even longer since you and your spouse went out for a date night. When my husband and I...
Webinar: When Marriage Gets Messy (Healing after Infidelity)
You may not be in the middle of an affair, but we all have to deal with sin in our relationships. It's easy to turn to other sources of comfort and avoid having hard conversations with your spouse. As your resentment builds, your heart drifts. Thankfully, Jesus has...
#40: Bonus! What Do You Fear?
The COVID-19 pandemic is pushing all of our anxiety buttons; loss of loved ones, financial loss, being stuck inside...
#306: When You Can’t Wait Another Day
What do you do when you find yourself in a situation you don't like, didn't sign up for, and can't wait to be done with? (Social...
COVID-19 and Porn: A Quick Fix But No Solution
(Presione aquí para leer en español). Since COVID-19 the pornography industry has seen a massive increase in website traffic. On March 24th, one major site announced that their premium content would be free to all visitors resulting in a massive increase of 18.5%. The...
Don’t Waste the Pain
Practically every conversation I’ve had in the last week has contained a phrase like, “These are strange times.” Strange times, indeed. Never in our lives have we walked through so much uncertainty. Our health, careers, and security all seem to be dangling on a...
#304: Stop Caring What Others Think
Are you constantly preoccupied with what others think about you? With how you look, how much money you make, or how many Instagram...
Stop Trying So Hard!
Several years ago, I met with a spiritual mentor with whom I shared an ongoing battle with a particular sin. We had been meeting every month for over a year, yet I was still tempted by the same sin. I didn’t feel like I was making any spiritual progress! I asked her,...
#22: Intimacy, Sex & Aging
Intimacy with your spouse is important is all phases of life--even when you're celebrating your 50th wedding...
When Christians Disagree About Sex
When the Nashville statement was released, it brought conservative Christianity’s relationship with sexual issues front and center into the mainstream media. USA Today described the Nashville statement this way, “A coalition of conservative evangelical leaders laid...
Learning To Be a Promise-Breaker
Has anyone ever told you that it may be healthy to break your promises? No, I’m not talking about going back on your word or taking your wedding vows lightly. I’m referring to a different category of vows … the kind of promises that people rarely acknowledge. Our...
#293: Secrets to a Lasting Relationship
Dating has changed. A LOT. In the last decade, cohabitation, sex, and sexual experimentation have been touted as the best ways to...
A Hopeless New Year?
Turning my calendar to January 1 is usually refreshing for me. It represents a new year with a clean slate and excitement ahead. So why does ushering in 2020 feel so heavy and discouraging? There are many indications that our culture is quickly moving in a dangerous...
The World Has a Lot To Say About Sex
If you haven’t noticed, our views on sexuality have changed quite a bit over the past 20 years. Americans are far more accepting of behaviors they once considered to be sexually immoral. Cohabitation, having sex outside of marriage, no-fault divorce, viewing...
Webinar: The Season for a Savior
Perhaps the best way to remember Jesus this Christmas is to imagine where you would be without Him. In this month’s webinar, we’ll talk practically about managing the tensions of Christmas; from strife in your marriage to losing a loved one to facing...
#291: Will You Trade Your Comfort Food for The Comforter?
Are you a sugar addict? Do you run to the pantry each afternoon to get you through your day? Do you turn to Starbucks...
#290: True Friendship, or merely Friend-ish?
A sweet friendship refreshes the soul –and it’s better to have a friend nearby than a relative far away...
What’s the Purpose of Your Sexuality, Really?
(Presione aquí para leer en español). If someone asks you, “What are your thoughts on cohabitation?” or “Do you believe God is ok with gay marriage?” how would you respond? To answer those questions, you will (without even realizing it) tap into your underlying...
Why Promise Rings and Purity Talks Fall Short
True Love Waits. I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Promise rings. These are the touchstones of predominant teaching on sexual purity promoted by the Christian community throughout the past several decades. Yet, the word purity among today’s Christian adults can elicit feelings...
#287: Does God Want Me to Have Good Self-Esteem?
How do I convince myself and everyone else that I’m worthy of being loved? That may not be what the question...
#286: How to Make Time to Make Love
Making time to make love is always going to take effort. There will always be an excuse to put it off for another season. Grab your...
Why Does Sex Matter in Marriage? Pt. 2
For the past decade, my full-time job has been to address sexual issues from a Christian perspective. Knowing that, you can imagine the kind of emails I regularly receive in my inbox! What I’ve learned is that sexuality represents pain in a lot of lives and marriages....
#55: When Marriage Won’t Get Better
What do you do when your marriage isn’t what you want it to be, but your spouse won't work on it, no matter...
Why Does Sex Matter in Marriage? Pt. 1
Most of us have been told that sex in marriage is important. But why does it matter? For many of us, sex may just be “meh” or tend to cause more division in our relationships than unity. The reality is that sexual issues are always among the top reasons for marital...
Escaping the Web of Pride
My dear friend Christine and I were recently talking over a cup of coffee about the battle of pride—how difficult it is to detect and how impossible to conquer. She told me a story that perfectly symbolized the problem: Juli, every morning I go out to my garden and...
#281: Growing Closer Through Conflict
There’s no such thing as instant intimacy. Love at first sight? Perhaps. But intimacy is something else entirely. It takes years to...
#280: When Submission Becomes Controlling
Sarah got married believing that absolute submission to her husband would glorify God; making Him, her and her man happy. Only, she...
Forgiveness is Hard, Grace is Harder
We spend a lot of time as Christ-followers talking about forgiving one another. After all, Jesus taught the importance of forgiveness, saying that our Heavenly Father will not forgive us if we fail to forgive each other. That’s pretty heavy! While forgiveness is a...
#278: Aging with Enthusiasm & Grace
Tomorrow isn't promised to any of us. How can we be grateful, joyful, and love others well whatever season we're in? Today...
Shame Doesn’t Have the Final Word
Most women bask in the comment “You look so young!” but not Jeni. Why? Because she is young … too young to be the mom of a six-year-old girl. When Jeni goes to her daughter’s kindergarten class, she feels out of place with every other mom, many of whom are more than a...
Joshua Harris, Sexuality, and “Deconstructing” Christianity
Recently, the evangelical world has been rocked by the news of Joshua Harris’s decision to leave his marriage and Christian beliefs. Joshua is the bestselling author of I Kissed Dating Goodbye and was a well-known spokesperson for the purity movement of the 1990s. A...
How to Have Tough Conversations
(Presione aquí para leer en español) If you listen to our podcast, Java with Juli, you know that I don’t like small talk. Ever since I was a little girl, I have been able to acutely sense unspoken tension in a room. I’m anxious when I have a conflict with a friend or...
#271: The Truth (and Lies) About Infertility
One in seven couples struggles with infertility --and it's easy to make some pretty hurtful assumptions about them...
#270: Winning the Battle in Your Mind
Sometimes the most difficult battles we face are the ones that rage within our own hearts and minds. In this episode, Juli gets...
#269: Loving Jesus in the Season You’re In
No matter what season of life you’re in, the object is the same: love Jesus and become more like Him. Are you single and wondering...
Where Do You Run When Marriage Gets Lonely?
It’s one thing to be lonely when you are single, wondering if and when God will ever bring the right guy. It’s another matter for your heart to ache with loneliness when the “right guy” is living in your home and sleeping in your bed. If this is your reality, please...
#266: Your Marriage, God’s Design
What do you want out of marriage? If you’re like most of us, you hope for love, companionship, passion and other good things that...
Beyond a Happy Marriage
Within the past month, I’ve been accused of two things that seem to be mutually exclusive. A few women have made comments like, “Why don’t you ever challenge the men? Why is it always the woman’s responsibility to build a healthy marriage?” And men have written me...
#265: The Hard (and Hopeful) Truth About Losing a Spouse
“God created our bodies to become one in marriage in a very physical and neurological way. When that is suddenly...
#264: You (Too) Can Help #MeToo
What can you do to make sure the voices of sexual abuse victims continue to be heard following the #MeToo movement? How...
#260: BONUS! Confused About Sexuality? We Understand
Why is there so much confusion in the Church about sex? If God's word is clear on this issue, why do so many great...
#11: When Work & Marriage Intersect
When you and your spouse have separate (but equally important) callings that pull you in different directions, who yields?...
#256: Who Is Jesus to You?
Every sexual question is a spiritual question. Every sexual opinion you hold comes from a foundation of who Jesus is to you. In the...
Your Sexual Differences Can Make You Better Lovers
Have you ever wondered why God made you and your husband so different? For many years, I thought that might be my first question to God when I got to heaven. The differences between me and my husband, particularly in the bedroom, were driving us both crazy. Sexual...
#253: Making the Gospel Beautiful Through Relationships
How do we foster relationships that show the world that the Gospel is not just beautiful, it's also...
#252: Finding Your Voice
Sexual abuse. Fame. Infidelity and divorce. Five-time Grammy award winner Sandi Patty has walked through them all. How has she come...
#251: Praying with Honesty and Abandon
Do you pray about your sex life? About that friend you're hoping will become more than a friend? Some of us...
When Your Child Has Been Sexually Abused
The headlines are filled with horrific accounts of childhood sexual abuse. Behind every headline are children and their parents, families grasping for help and hope through devastating news. We have received many emails from parents who recently discovered that their...
#161: Beyond Pro-Life vs. Pro-Choice
Take the politics out of conversations about abortion. You don't have to choose between valuing the rights of a...
#249: Overcoming Differences With Your Spouse
Opposites attract... for a little while. Then those cute, quirky things that attracted you to your spouse early on...
#246: Lies You Believe About Sex
"I'm not loved if I'm not desired." "I don't deserve a great sex life." "God...
#245: The Link Between Your Bedroom & Your Bank Account
Have you ever hidden a receipt from your spouse? Join Juli and her guests to find out why holding grudges or...
#244: Your Love-Hate Relationship with Food
Do you want out of your love-hate relationship with food? This isn't a conversation about what you should or...
Your Husband Needs You Too
I vividly remember life as it was about 15 years ago. A newborn, a 4-year-old and a 6-year-old, all boys. Most mornings, I woke up to someone crying or pleading for breakfast. From the time my feet hit the ground until I went to bed, someone needed me. I was acutely...
#242: Worried About the Future? Find Hope Here
We naturally fear what we don't understand or can't control -- like the messages and confusion surrounding...
#238: Josh Harris is Rethinking “I Kissed Dating Goodbye”
What if you gave millions of people the wrong advice? Two decades ago Josh Harris turned the Christian dating world...
#235: How the Purity Movement Hurt Us
"I always thought that if I did everything the way God told us to, then I would be blessed, I would be happy, and I would have a...
#233: Understanding Your Man
From "All he thinks about is sex!" to "Why doesn't he ever initiate?" this Java with Juli...
#229: Sex, Teens, & Parenting
Your daughter is sexting her boyfriend. Your son sees porn on a friend's phone. Now that you've yelled, confiscated their devices...
#226: Culture, Technology & Your Child
If raising kids isn’t hard enough, throw smart phones, social media and video games into the mix and you have...
Sexual Pleasure Isn’t Shameful
God cares about your sex life. It may seem weird to see the words God and sex in the same sentence. Sometimes when I teach women on this topic, they have a visceral reaction to the concept of God knowing about their sex lives. Psalm 139 tells us that God is always...
Webinar: Fighting Masturbation and Fantasy
Every day we receive questions from men and women around masturbation and fantasy. Is masturbation a sin? How do I know when I've "crossed the line" into sinful sexual fantasy? How do we differentiate between healthy sexual desire and sinful lust? What if I'm single?...
#220: Rethinking Sexuality In Your Parenting
If you don’t teach your children about sex, someone else will. Listen in as Juli shares the resources you...
#219: Rethinking Sexuality in Your Marriage
Does God care about what goes on inside your bedroom? We think so. God has something to teach you about...
#218: Rethinking Sexuality in Your Life
Do I really need to save sex for marriage? What’s wrong with porn if I’m not hurting anyone...
#217: Finding Hope After Betrayal
The man who vowed to love, cherish and protect you is cheating, lying and hiding. Now what? In this episode, Dr. Juli Slattery is...
#215: Miscarriage & Infertility
After years of buying baby gifts for friends, one in every eight women wonder if it will ever be her turn. Is she...
Parenting as a Team
When I look at the home my husband grew up in and compare it to how I was raised, it’s a wonder we ended up together. Our backgrounds are so completely opposite that no marriage counselor in her right mind would have suggested that we marry. Once we said, “I do,” Mike...
Webinar: Guilt & Motherhood: When You Think You’re Messing It Up
Practically every mother wrestles with guilt because there is no such thing as a perfect mom. We instinctively know that the choices we make will impact our children's lives. How can we parent our kids without being paralyzed by the guilt of our mistakes and fear of...
#205: My Husband’s Addiction Saved My Life
From the outside they had a perfect Christian family --a happy marriage, jobs in ministry and successful kids. ...
The Great Danger: He Can Have My Body, But…
Jerusha Clark wrote the following guest blog as a follow up to her and Juli's conversation on Java with Juli. Jerusha and her husband Jeramy have been sharing their journey of marriage and parenting for many years, encouraging others with what God is teaching them.You...
Webinar: Loving Your LGBT Neighbor
Ever feel like we're just fumbling through the LGBT conversation, always asking but never really finding Biblical answers to questions like: What does it look like to be friends with my lesbian neighbors? How should I love my gay child and his partner? What if I'm...