Authentic Intimacy

#339: How to Have Hard Conversations with (Facebook) Friends

If you were standing in front of a crowd of 300 to speak, how carefully would you craft your words? Okay, so you’re actually at home...

#331: Say Goodbye to Labels

Life is tends to put labels on us. We even pin labels on ourselves. More often than not, these labels are hurtful,...

#330: Loving the Person Who Isn’t Like You

It’s easy to love the neighbor who looks like us, thinks like us, and believes like us. With those who don't fall into those...

JWJ Listening Guide: Taking Back the Bedroom

This specially curated Java Pack is a wife’s guide to sex and intimacy. Every marriage contends with highs and lows in the bedroom. For some couples it’s a fire that’s fizzling out, while others have always struggled to find a spark. In Taking Back the Bedroom, you’ll hear some of our most popular content for understanding God’s design for sexuality within marriage.

JWJ Listening Guide: Single & Sexual

Did you know that single people are sexual? That your sexuality has nothing to do with whether or not you are having sex? As ridiculous as it sounds, many Christians grow up thinking that they will magically become sexual when they get married. In this Java Pack, Dr. Juli Slattery and her guests discuss how to embrace your sexuality, even as a single Christian committed to saving sex for marriage, and what your sexuality can teach you about yourself and about God. They’ll also dive into details on dating, friendships, community, and the Church.

#320: Bonus! Looking for the Spark in Your Marriage?

Thanks to COVID-19, you and your spouse have likely spent a lot of time together the last five months—but that doesn't necessarily...

#317: Bonus! Listen, Learn, and Give Grace (A Conversation About Race)

Are you grieved by the pain and brokenness you see in your news feed each day? We are too. God’s Word tells us that when one part of...

#315: Jamie Ivey Wants to Know the Real You

There are things we feel are acceptable to struggle with, and then there are those things we would never say out loud –especially...

Webinar: How Can God Be Good If…?

Our beliefs about sexuality begin and end with our beliefs about God. Is He trustworthy? Is His Word reliable? Why wouldn't a loving God embrace me just the way I am? In this webinar, Juli and Dr. Jo Vitale, a Christian apologist, talk about how acknowledging the...

#305: Becoming the Right Kind of Strong

The famous Proverbs 31 woman was "clothed in strength and dignity." She was strong! But perhaps not by our...

Did He Pass the Test?

This morning, I met with a group of friends to encourage each other in our marriages. As we talked, one of the women described her discouragement when her husband failed to text her during the day about something that was important to her. “He knew my sister was going...

#299: Making Marriage Fun! (Even When It’s Hard)

Marriage can be hard, but it doesn’t have to stop being fun! Arguments, grief, or even just the busyness of life...

Helping Your Husband Grow UP

We’ve written before about the growing trend of husbands who would rather play their Xbox or Nintendo Switch—or spend hours glued to ESPN, oblivious of your screaming child and leaking roof—than step into adult responsibilities. Whatever the scenario, the burden of...

Webinar: How to Talk to Your Spouse About Sex

Talking about sex with your spouse is scary... especially when one (or both!) of you is disappointed, frustrated, or resentful about how things are currently. How do you have healthy conversations about sex, when every other attempt has been wrought with tension? ÊHow...

Webinar: Does Your Sex Life Have Shades of Gray?

Why are some Christians okay with sex toys, masturbation, and cohabitation while others believe it's wrong to kiss before marriage? Whether you're single or married, honoring God with your sexuality means discerning the dangers of both license and legalism in the...

Webinar: The Art of Asking Good Questions

In an era of emotionally charged politics, #MeToo, and gender identity questions, we've all witnessed, and likely experienced, how engaging with others can quickly lead to heated conversations and hurt feelings. How do we talk about difficult things in a way that BOTH...

#284: Be a Truth Teller

If you're tired of smiling on the outside while you are broken and battered on the inside, Ashley Abercrombie has a message for you...

Webinar: Addressing Tough Topics with Truth & Love

In July 2019, best-selling author Josh Harris (I Kissed Dating Goodbye) announced that he and his wife are separating. The hundreds of comments to his Instagram post mirror how Christians generally respond to difficult issues and brokenness. One person wrote,...

Drowning in Shallow Christianity

I recently met with a friend who shared openly with me about her struggles in marriage. “It’s like living with a robot! He doesn’t seem to know how to connect emotionally. Am I supposed to live the next thirty years with this man? Does God really want me to be so...

#261: Bravery Means Being the Real You

You’re braver than you think. Bravery doesn’t always mean running into a burning building. For most...

A Perfect Marriage

Mike and I recently attended a wedding. The bride was stunning, and the groom gleamed with pride. Not a dry eye in the place. Weddings are beautiful—not just because of the music, flowers, dresses, and tuxes, but also because they represent young, unblemished love....

Webinar: Overcoming Barriers in the Bedroom

Do you hate sex? Are you too tired, never in the mood, or is sex too painful? Maybe there’s too much tension in your marriage to desire any sexual intimacy with your husband. Dr. Juli Slattery will be teaching on overcoming barriers in the bedroom and sharing things...

A Secret for the Guys

Every day we hear from men who desperately want help and encouragement for their wives. Most commonly, they complain that their wives are not interested in sexual intimacy. Many of these messages end with pleas like “Help me! What can I do to help her understand my...

Webinar: Tackling Shame

One of the most common themes in the questions we receive at Authentic Intimacy is shame. What is it? Where does it come from? How do I get rid of it? Can God really forgive every sin? If so, why do I still have so much shame? In this webinar, we address these issues...

Is There Really a 7-Year Itch?

My husband and I are leading a Bible study with mostly newlywed couples. After a few weeks, we noticed how often we referred to the seven-year-something . . . itch? pit? slump? The other couples in the group started nervously teasing about what terrible blockade may...

Webinar: Tools You Need for Healthier Relationships

You have a lot of relationships in your life: parents, family, friends, colleagues, and your spouse. These relationships have huge effects on your emotional health, day to day living, and often your interaction with God. What percentage of your relationships are...

Have You Forgotten Who God Is?

In the process of teaching about biblical sexuality, I have at times taken a critical look at traditions Christians have long held as truth. For example, you may have heard a recent Java with Juli episode exploring the missteps and harmful messages of the conservative...

#241: Women Struggle With Porn Too

Do you think women don't get addicted to porn? Think again. In this episode Juli's guest shares candidly about how she became...

#239: Stop Dreading Christmas

Somewhere along the line, this "most wonderful time of the year" overwhelms us, making our souls feel both...

I Don’t Trust Myself

A few days ago, I rushed to see Toni (the lady who cuts my hair) in the middle of the work day. I got there with just a few minutes to spare after getting off a conference call. Someone else was sitting in Toni’s chair. “I’ll just wait in the lobby until you’re done,”...

Pure Sadness and a Better Way Forward

I recently read a very sad book, Pure by Linda Kay Klein. This book keeps popping up in my newsfeed which tells me that people want to talk about it. The subtitle of the book hits precisely why this book caused my heart to ache: “Inside the evangelical movement that...

Webinar: Sexuality and Parenting

How do you teach your kids about God's design and purpose for sexuality? How do you relate to your kids when today's sexual culture is so different from the sexual culture of your own childhood? During this webinar, Dr. Juli Slattery explains what it looks like to...

Your Spouse Doesn’t Complete You

When is the last time you felt disappointed by your marriage? Notice that I asked when, not if. Disappointment is a normal part of any relationship, but it hits us particularly hard in marriage. We live in a day and time when marriage is presented as an answer for...

#230: Juli & Linda Answer Your Questions About Marriage

Do you believe the Bible has answers to your questions about marriage and sexuality? We know it does! On this Java with Juli, Juli...

Webinar: Female Friendships—the Good AND the Bad

We can all agree that having female friends is a great gift in life, but why can they cause so much difficulty? Dr. Juli Slattery hosts this webinar with one of her favorite friends, Erin Smalley! These two share the value in friendship, be honest about why it can be...

#227: Couples Therapy For Intimacy Issues

Have you ever wondered whether or not you should see a sex therapist? From sexual addiction to sexual anorexia, a good therapist can...

Loving a Broken Man (Or Woman)

Gary Thomas has been a guest on Java with Juli multiple times and also joined us for our webinar "Having a Mission-Focused Marriage." He is a bestselling author and international speaker whose ministry brings people closer to Christ and closer to others. He unites the...

#48: My Controlling Spouse

If you are fearful or hesitant to share your true thoughts with your spouse, you may be in an unhealthy pattern with a controlling spouse. What are the red flags, and how can you change things? Very few couples know how to address this issue, but it can be a fatal...

Webinar: Sex Talk in Your Marriage: Conversations Every Couple Should Be Having

You can read books on how to have "the talk" with your kids, but do you have the talk in your marriage? We believe that conversations around sexuality should not just take place when there is a problem or you are figuring out when to have sex. In this webinar, Dr....

#225: How To Find the Right Guy

There is no magic formula to find a great husband, but there are decisions you can make today that will help you...

Webinar: Rethinking Sexuality: God’s Design and Why It Matters

We believe every Christian needs to be equipped with a Biblical understanding of sexuality. Not just, "Don't do it until your married,"but a full, practical, and Biblical narrative that we know, live out, and teach others. Dr. Juli Slattery invites you to join her for...

#221: Conversations You Should Be Having About Money

How important is it for us to get out of debt? Should we give to our church? Where is the balance between having faith...

#224: Sexuality & Surrender

Laurie daily submits her same-sex sexuality to the Lordship of Christ while married to her best friend, Matt. ...

#223: Counseling: When & Why You Should Go

Marriage counseling sounds intimidating... and expensive. So why should you go? (Surely you can sort things out...

The “Why” for Every Question About Sexuality

When children reach the age of two, they begin asking a question they never stop asking. Why? If you are parenting a young child, you are faced with endless why questions. Why do I have to go to bed so early? Why do I have to eat brussel sprouts? Why do you have to go...

#216: BONUS! Do You Have an Agenda?

Relationships are tricky. Loving others well takes intentionality. It’s hard to watch our friends, co-workers, or kids make sexual...

#213: Sexuality & the Conversations the Church Forgot

Ready or not, the body of Christ needs and wants to have conversations about sex. Are you equipped? On this Java with...

#206: BONUS! Rebel Parenting

Ryan Dobson admits he was a rebellious kid. These days, as a husband and father, he’s a different kind of rebel....

#212: Female Friendships Are Complicated

Has a friend ever told you she needs a break from you? Do you make friends fast and lose them quickly? It’s no secret that women...

#210: Enjoying Intimacy in Your Golden Years

It’s no secret that aging changes us. Our bodies don’t work the way they used to. Sex doesn’t work the way it used to. What once happened easily is now difficult and awkward. Is it time to close the chapter on sex? Not so fast! Join Juli and her guests as they...

Does Your Husband Need Sex?

Until recently, it has been part of the Christian marriage narrative that men need sex. Christian marriage books over the decades have repeatedly claimed that sex is a primary need for guys in marriage. In many marriages (but not all), husbands would eagerly nod their...

#208: The Forgiveness & Intimacy Link

Have you ever sabotaged a relationship because you think you deserve to be unhappy? Are you bitter toward a spouse who has already...

#207: Making Motherhood Meaningful

Hey moms, do you feel like you’re missing out on life while staying at home with kids? Are you exhausted, unsure of yourself, or...

#204: Managing Your Expectations in Marriage

Once I am married I’ll always feel loved. I’ll never be lonely. Sex will be fantastic because I waited....

Learning to Say “I Was Wrong”

If you are old enough to recall the sitcom Happy Days, you’ll remember “The Fonz.” Henry Winkler played the character of Arthur Fonzarelli, the coolest guy in town. The Fonz in his leather jacket and perfect hair could get all the ladies with the snap of his fingers....

#200: Listening So People Will Talk

The call to be a good listener comes straight from Jesus: in order to feel loved, people have to feel heard. Great...

When Your Kids Look At Porn

As the mom of three sons, there are days I wish I could be parenting in a different era… one in which cell phones did not exist and comic books were more common than pornography. Yet we do not choose the time and place which God inserts us into history. Pornography...

Webinar: Spicing Up Your Sex Life

Do you know that God's desire is for you and your husband to experience great pleasure in your sex life? Many couples settle for "vanilla" sex for years (aka the missionary position), placing self-imposed restrictions on themselves that have nothing to do with God's...

#194: Enjoying Date Nights With Your Spouse

Regardless of how long you’ve been married, date nights are still important! In this episode of Java with Juli, Juli talks with Dr....

#192: Engaging in Restorative Relationships

We are wounded in relationships with others, and it only makes sense that relationships are also where our healing will...

#191: Understanding Your Teenager’s Brain

Modern science has allowed us to see exactly what is going on inside the adolescent brain, and what we see can help YOU...

Another Reminder That Something is Wrong

Several months ago, I got really sick. I was in bed for days with a high fever and chills, a deep cough, and no appetite. I gave the illness several days to run its course, treating my symptoms with Tylenol and cough medicine. When I didn’t get better, my husband took...

#2: Unleashing the Power of Woman

What’s the difference between having power or being controlling in marriage? How do you have influence...

What If I Hate Sex?

"I hate sex. It makes me angry to hear you even suggest that I’m supposed to be enjoying it. I’ve...

What If I Want Sex More Than My Husband Does?

I get asked this a lot. A woman often sheepishly approaches me at an event and says, “I’m one of those women you talked about who has a higher sex drive than my husband. What should I do?” Because women in this situation defy the stereotype, they sometimes feel shame...

#184: Authentic Intimacy Prepared Me for Marriage

We love hearing your stories. The excitement that flows from the heart of a woman who has been changed by God is...

Why the Word “Purity” is Cringy

My teenage sons have recently introduced me to a new word… “cringy.” It’s how they describe my attempts to dance and many of my lame puns. But it’s also the word many would associate with the term “sexual purity.” As a ministry, we’ve shied away from teaching about...

#181: What Is the “Price” of Sex?

Birth control, pornography, online dating –according to our guest on this Java with Juli, all of these technologies...

Webinar: How to Love Your Prodigal Child

Join Hannah Nitz as she sits down with Lori Wildenberg & Dr. Juli Slattery to talk about how to love your prodigal child. Lori is a mother who recognized her daughter's gender confusion early on. Despite many prayers and conversations, her daughter now leads a...

#58: Lessons From a Former Prostitute

Angel lived a life of prostitution and drugs on the streets of Akron, Ohio. Her life changed the day she met Becky, a woman who...

Webinar: Fighting Porn in Your Marriage

A recent survey revealed that approximately 85% of men interact with pornographic material on a monthly basis. With that statistic, we know that means porn has made it's way into many of our marriages. Pornography is killing our intimacy, and its widespread use and...

Webinar: Sex & the Single Girl

The average single Christian has received very little teaching on the purpose of sexuality, and a simple "Just wait until you're married" approach won't cut it. Christian singles need to be equipped with a biblical worldview of sexuality and practical tools for...

#173: Lessons I Learned from Grief

“One of the things I learned was that I could not fix what was broken, but I could create something new.” Join Dr. Juli Slattery and...

#172: My Husband Isn’t My Best Friend

When you say “I do”, are you also promising to be your spouse’s best friend? Is it important to think...

#67: Thinking About Remarriage?

Most people never plan on marrying twice, but many of us will. No matter how you got here, the decision to remarry can...

#171: Dating in 2017

Fifty years ago, the original Dating Game featured a single young woman who got to choose between three eligible bachelors. Not...

#167: People Are More Important Than Marriage

“If the cost of saving a marriage is destroying a woman, the cost is too high.” When Gary Thomas, author of the best-selling book...

#165: How to Talk with Your Spouse About ANYTHING

Some things aren’t worth talking about. Whenever you bring them up with your spouse, you end up in an argument....

#164: How to Work Through Missed Expectations in Marriage

Marriage doesn’t always turn out the way you think it will. Maybe your husband isn’t quite the gentleman he...

#163: Women & the Tough Bible Verses

Do you bristle at being called “the weaker sex” or at the suggestion that women should stay silent in...

#162: Helping Your Kids Navigate the Culture

Same-sex marriage, social media, easy-access pornography… this generation of young people faces a culture that is changing more...

BONUS! When God Re-Writes Your Story

Mary DeMuth has a powerful story to tell: what it was like to return to the place where she was raped at five years old. On this...

#88: When Sex Is Too Painful

When sex is painful, many husbands and wives live with frustration and shame because they don't know where to get help. On this Java...

#149: Getting to the Heart of Female Same-Sex Attraction

At the core of any relationship are two people who care about each other. So when you don’t approve of a relationship, how do you...

Webinar: When Your Greatest Fears Come True

Can you think of your greatest fear? Perhaps it's your husband getting into pornography, finding out you've been cheated on, watching your kids walk away from the Lord, or great harm being done to you. When your worst fear comes true, how do you continue to walk in...

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