Authentic Intimacy

#45: Where’s My Prince Charming

#45: Where’s My Prince Charming

So many Christian women “do all the right things”. They save their virginity for their wedding night, read the Word and attend...

#35: Should Women Lead?

#35: Should Women Lead?

Juli Slattery & Sherry Surratt are two women who have stepped into large leadership positions in the Christian community. They...

#34: Women Who Are Caregivers

#34: Women Who Are Caregivers

Although our guests aren’t biological sisters (they sure could be!), they do share one very monumental life circumstance…both of...

#31: In Honor of Military Spouses

#31: In Honor of Military Spouses

We want to thank all military families by honoring the spouses who stand behind our warriors! This episode gives a good picture of...

Why Your Story Matters

Why Your Story Matters

Have you ever wondered if your life matters? Out of all of the people on the planet, why is your life unique? From the time of my childhood, I’ve heard that I was made “in the image of God.” This one truth sets all humanity apart from every other created being. As...

Encountering the Radical Love of Jesus

Encountering the Radical Love of Jesus

Through our work at Authentic Intimacy, Linda Dillow and I have met hundreds of women on a healing journey. Some are dealing with sexual trauma, others infidelity and betrayal, and still others can’t shake the shame from their past. We have witnessed the power of our...

Who is at the Center of Your Marriage?

Who is at the Center of Your Marriage?

What is the most effective glue in marriage? Many modern couples would answer, “our children.” The Atlantic recently published an article stating that modern marriages are becoming more child-centered. It is an emerging trend for several reasons. Most notably, more...

What Should You Do If Your Husband Looks at Porn?

What Should You Do If Your Husband Looks at Porn?

(Presione aquí para leer en español). “Last night I walked in on my husband viewing porn. This isn’t the first time this has happened. I feel so violated—like I could never share my body with him again. Why should I, anyway? I could never compete with porn!” If your...

Why We Must Be Surprised by the Healer

Why We Must Be Surprised by the Healer

This month I gave birth to my eighth book. Actually, it was a “co-labor” with my dear friend and mentor, Linda Dillow. When I use the word “labor,” I mean it. This book, Surprised by the Healer, was probably the most difficult that either of us has ever written....

3 Things Sex and Junk Food Have in Common

3 Things Sex and Junk Food Have in Common

I recently read a book about sexual patterns among young adults called Premarital Sex in America by Mark Regnerus and Jeremy Uecker. Let’s just say that the news is not good. Americans are having sex younger and sooner in relationships, with more people and are...

What Do You Do When the Person You’re Dating Struggles With Porn?

What Do You Do When the Person You’re Dating Struggles With Porn?

Dear Juli, I'm currently in a season of singleness, but I've had two serious relationships with godly guys before this. Both (not right away) admitted to struggling/having struggled with pornography. At first, I was shocked and a little disgusted. Talking to them,...

Don’t Be Spontaneous In Marriage

Don’t Be Spontaneous In Marriage

Want to watch a group of women swoon? Tell a story about a husband who was completely spontaneous. There is something about the mystery and surprise of impromptu romance that fills women with passion! Anything from randomly picking up flowers to a last minute road...

5 Secrets to Intimacy with God

5 Secrets to Intimacy with God

Intimacy with God . . . what a strange concept! How can I be intimate with someone I can’t see, hear, or touch? God and I can’t go out for coffee or even give each other a hug. Yet we know that God created us for intimate fellowship with him. What is that supposed to...

A Christian Mom, Her Sexual Addiction, and Forgiveness

A Christian Mom, Her Sexual Addiction, and Forgiveness

Sexual addiction doesn’t always have the face you think it will. I was speaking at a large women’s leaders conference in Texas. In the middle of worship, I suddenly found a woman weeping uncontrollably in my arms. I escorted her out of the room, holding her as she...

Confessions of a Former Erotica Author

Confessions of a Former Erotica Author

I had the opportunity to have coffee with Francine Rivers, bestselling author of Redeeming Love. Francine used to write erotic historical fiction. She offers insight into how erotica is a harmful escape, both to the author and reader. You can listen to our...

How We Become Angry People

How We Become Angry People

As Christians, what is our anger supposed to look like? Juli shares some helpful ways to navigate anger and still glorify God.

Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids

Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids

Today’s Christian parents often feel torn between the cultural messages of sex positivity and traditional church teachings about saving sex for marriage, both of which seem fraught with potential challenges and pitfalls. While cultural messages are at odds with God’s...

Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How

Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How

My husband had just returned home with our youngest son after a weekend away for the sex talk. Christian, eleven at the time, sheepishly told me, “Mom, I feel like I’m too young to know all these things about sex.” I reassured him, “I know how you feel, but Dad and I...

Does God Want Me to Love Myself?

Does God Want Me to Love Myself?

This is potentially the most controversial blog I have ever written. As I’ve often stated, the Bible isn’t primarily offensive because of what it says about our sexuality. It is offensive because of what it says about our humanity. You may disagree with what you are...

Help! How Much Sex is “Normal” for Married Couples?

Help! How Much Sex is “Normal” for Married Couples?

It isn’t uncommon for us to receive questions from married couples asking about a normal frequency for sex. Should they have sex once a week, twice a week, or every day?! We understand that it can be challenging for two people with different levels of desire for sex...

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima?

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima?

¿Qué hace que una relación sea íntima? Hace unos años, estaba hablando en un campus universitario sobre el diseño de Dios para la sexualidad. Durante un descanso, una joven se me acercó con una pregunta. “Dijiste que Dios me creó para la intimidad. ¿No es la intimidad...

What Defines an Intimate Relationship?

What Defines an Intimate Relationship?

A few years ago, I was speaking at a college campus about God’s design for sexuality. During a break, a young woman approached me with a question, “You said that God created me for intimacy. Isn’t intimacy the same thing as having sex?” (Presione aquí para leer en...

3 Ways To Make Sexual Intimacy a Priority in Your Marriage

3 Ways To Make Sexual Intimacy a Priority in Your Marriage

It’s often said, “Show me your calendar, and I’ll tell you what is important to you.” There are a lot of things we say are important to us but end up taking a back seat to busyness and the distractions that clamor for our attention. Intimacy in marriage is usually one...

What God Wants For Christmas

What God Wants For Christmas

True confession: the Christmas season overwhelms me. It’s not the busyness, the music, or the parties, but the gift-giving that stresses me out. Gifts are not my love language, so I never know how to answer my husband when he asks what I’d like for Christmas. What...

Church Is Good For You; It’s Time To Go Back

Church Is Good For You; It’s Time To Go Back

I meet more and more Christians who have simply given up on church. Maybe you are one of them. You’ve been disappointed by a leader, disillusioned by division, or just can’t find a place you belong. Through COVID-19 quarantines, perhaps you settled into a new routine...

3 Reasons To Invite Women Into Conversations About Sexual Brokenness

3 Reasons To Invite Women Into Conversations About Sexual Brokenness

I opened my door and there she stood. She was nervous. I invited her inside my home, offered her a cup of coffee, and we sat down on my couch. I could see the hesitancy on her face as she fidgeted with her phone. I asked her to tell me a bit about her story.  My new...

Honestamente, ¿cuál es el propósito de tu sexualidad?

Si alguien te pregunta, “¿Cuál es tu opinión en cuanto a vivir con tu pareja sin estar casados?” o “¿Crees que Dios está de acuerdo con el matrimonio gay?” ¿Cómo responderías? Para responder estas preguntas, vas a terminar (sin siquiera darte cuenta) yendo a tus...

Sexual Attraction Isn’t as Important as You Think, Here’s Why

Sexual Attraction Isn’t as Important as You Think, Here’s Why

Within the past few months, several different people have posed questions to me about the importance of sexual attraction. - A young woman asked, “I am in a dating relationship with a great guy. We connect on a lot of levels, but I’m not sexually attracted to him....

Límites sexuales en la soltería

Límites sexuales en la soltería

Cuando las mujeres abordan temas de sexualidad, las preguntas más comunes usualmente tienen que ver con cuáles cosas está bien que una mujer cristiana interactúe y con cuáles no. Quieren saber cuáles son los límites....

What Kind of Lover Are You?

What Kind of Lover Are You?

As women, we typically view sex as a way of expressing the love and intimacy we feel in our hearts. It’s definitely a challenge to be sexually intimate when those feelings of love are absent. For the first decade of our marriage, it irritated me when my husband wanted...

Three Things I (Wish I Hadn’t) Learned From Pornography

Three Things I (Wish I Hadn’t) Learned From Pornography

When I was a fifth grader, my friend opened my laptop and introduced me to pornography. At the time, I didn’t know what pornography was, but I did know that it was something new and exciting. Years would go by before I rediscovered porn. In college, after experiencing...

Purity Culture: Lose the Lies, Keep Your Faith

Purity Culture: Lose the Lies, Keep Your Faith

If you want to get “cancelled” in Christian culture, try using the phrase “sexual purity.” Even for many committed Christians, sexual purity has lost its luster. Women are writing dissertations and books about how the Church’s teaching on sex has not only harmed them...

Cuando te atrae alguien que no es tu cónyuge

Cuando te atrae alguien que no es tu cónyuge

El estereotipo de una relación adúltera en el matrimonio ha sido típicamente la imagen de un marido infiel. El hombre tiene una aventura de una noche en un viaje de negocios o se enamora de su secretaria. Supongo que nunca se nos ocurrió...

Five Things You Need to Know About Women, Orgasm & Intimacy

Five Things You Need to Know About Women, Orgasm & Intimacy

After speaking at a marriage event, I spent time with couples who wanted to ask a question or share a comment. A young couple sat patiently and silently until everyone else had left the auditorium. As I sat down to talk with them, they could barely get the words out. The young man began, “This is really embarrassing, but we don’t know where else to go for help. Umm, we’ve been married for, umm, six years and umm….” His wife quietly finished his sentence, “I don’t know how to achieve an orgasm.”

La importancia del discipulado sexual

La importancia del discipulado sexual

Durante los últimos años, he estado usando este término "discipulado sexual ™" para describir algo que verdaderamente nos apasiona en el ministerio de Intimidad Auténtica. Me he dado cuenta de que cuando las personas me escuchan unir esas dos palabras, se sienten...

Soltería y sexualidad

Soltería y sexualidad

¿Sabías que las mujeres solteras son sexuales? ¿Que tu sexualidad no tiene nada que ver con tener sexo o no? Por ridículo que parezca, muchos cristianos crecen pensando que mágicamente se volverán seres sexuales cuando se casen. Los solteros son seres sexuales creados...

Cómo elegir un consejero sabio

Cómo elegir un consejero sabio

Después de todos tus propios esfuerzos y tus agallas, tus oraciones y búsqueda de consejos, tus lecturas e investigaciones te das cuenta de que lo has intentado todo y aún persistes en tu lucha. Llegaste a ese punto en el que sabes que necesitas...

Are You Entitled to (Good) Sex In Marriage?

Are You Entitled to (Good) Sex In Marriage?

A man approached me after hearing me speak on the topic of sexual intimacy and thanked me for talking openly about such a vulnerable subject. Then he began sharing his story with me. He had just divorced his wife of 29 years because of a lack of fulfilling sex in...

ÀPuedo ser piadosa y gay?

ÀPuedo ser piadosa y gay?

Extraído de 25 Preguntas Que Tienes Miedo de Hacer Sobre el Amore, el Sexo, y la Intimidad de Dr. Juli Slattery. © 2015 en Unilit Publishers. Usado con permiso. Esta pregunta es un barril de pólvora; un asunto sensible...

Cómo tener conversaciones difíciles

Cómo tener conversaciones difíciles

Las personas que escuchan nuestro podcast, Java con Juli, saben que no me gusta hablar por hablar. Desde que era una niña, he sido capaz de sentir agudamente la tensión tácita en una habitación. Me pongo ansiosa cuando tengo un conflicto sin resolver con un amigo o...

¿Qué pasa si quiero más sexo que mi esposo?

¿Qué pasa si quiero más sexo que mi esposo?

Esto me lo preguntan mucho. A menudo, una mujer se me acerca con timidez en un evento y dice: «Soy una de esas mujeres de las que habló que tiene más deseo sexual que su esposo. ¿Qué debo hacer?». Puesto que las mujeres en esta situación desafían el estereotipo, a...

As Christians, How Do We Respond to Abuse Allegations in the Church?

As Christians, How Do We Respond to Abuse Allegations in the Church?

No, Lord, not another one! My stomach feels sick every time I see the headline of a Christian leader accused of sexual misconduct. Over the years some of you have reached out to ask me what I think about high profile accusations of Christian leaders. You’ve wondered...

Experience Freedom From Shame

Experience Freedom From Shame

I’ll never forget how I felt the first time I looked into the mirror after being date raped in college. I stood there naked, alone, and ashamed. I began to question God and His love for me. Soon after this moment, I cried out to God in a journal entry. I wrote, God do...

Relational Revelation

Relational Revelation

As a Christian psychologist, I sometimes feel like I’m in the crosshairs of pastors and therapists who disagree about the road to healing. Those who study theology and teach the Bible often emphasize the importance of God’s Word and prayer. Christians in the therapy...

Date Nights In Video Series

Date Nights In Video Series

Make the most of date nights at home and join Dr. Juli Slattery and her husband, Mike, for this virtual “Date Nights In” series. Each session includes a one-hour video teaching on an aspect of growing closer together in sexual intimacy, live Q&A, and a homework assignment.

#195: Finding Your Confidence

#195: Finding Your Confidence

Who do you think you are? Do you think you’re brave? Do you think you’re creative? “I love to encourage other women to stop...

Webinar: Human Trafficking in Your City

Webinar: Human Trafficking in Your City

Do you know what human trafficking looks like in your city? Would you be able to recognize a woman who is in need of help? If so, how would you help her? In this webinar, Hannah Nitz sits down with two women who work against human trafficking everyday in Akron, Ohio....

They’re Right. Abstinence-Only Education Doesn’t Work.

They’re Right. Abstinence-Only Education Doesn’t Work.

The New York Times and other prominent news sources recently reported that there is now proof that abstinence-only programs don’t work. A meta-analysis of data (this means analyzing data from a number of different studies) “found no good evidence that such programs...

You Can Be Single & Sexual

You Can Be Single & Sexual

(Presione aquí para leer en español) Did you know that single women are sexual? That your sexuality has nothing to do with whether or not you are having sex? As ridiculous as it sounds, many Christians grow up thinking that they will magically become sexual when they...

Sexual Boundaries for Singles

Sexual Boundaries for Singles

When women ask their honest questions about sexuality, the most common ones typically relate to whether certain things are right or wrong for Christian women to engage in. They want to know where the boundaries lie. (Presione aquí para leer en español).  Is...

Webinar: When You Feel Like Quitting

Webinar: When You Feel Like Quitting

For many of us, the small sentence "I feel like quitting" can jump into our minds often. When we are in the middle of a hard season, tough situation, or even just a long day, life can feel too heavy. Can you relate to wanting to quit when it comes to your marriage...

Can I Be Godly and Gay?

Can I Be Godly and Gay?

Excerpted from 25 Questions You’re Afraid to Ask About Love, Sex, and Intimacy by Dr. Juli Slattery. © 2015 by Moody Publishers. Used with Permission. This question is a powder-keg–an extremely sensitive issue. If you have gay or bi-sexual tendencies, this is not just...

Gay Marriage and What We’ve Forgotten About God

Gay Marriage and What We’ve Forgotten About God

A.W. Tozer wrote, “The most important thing about you is what you believe about God.” There is a lot in the news today about what Christian leaders think about Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump, and gay marriage. Specifically, Jen Hatmaker’s recent comments have created...

Webinar: Making Fireworks in the Bedroom

Webinar: Making Fireworks in the Bedroom

Join Dr. Juli Slattery and Hannah Nitz as they have a practical conversation about growing sexual intimacy in your marriage. They'll dive into ways you and your spouse can celebrate the covenant of marriage in the bedroom and grow closer together as husband and...

#108: With This Ring

#108: With This Ring

February is the month when romance seems to be in the air but are you taking every aspect of love and marriage...

#107: Surprised By The Healer

#107: Surprised By The Healer

Listen to the founders of Authentic Intimacy, Dr. Juli Slattery and Linda Dillow talk about a book they co-authored, Surprised by...

#104: The Myth of Safe Sex

#104: The Myth of Safe Sex

Are you gambling against your life on the myth of “safe sex”? Dr. Juli Slattery has a conversation with an...

#87: Uncovering Hidden Anger

#87: Uncovering Hidden Anger

Is anger a sin or is it a normal healthy emotion? When you get angry, how do you handle the issue at hand? Join Dr. Juli Slattery...

#80: Conflict In Marriage

#80: Conflict In Marriage

In your marriage, do you fight - or do you just have conflicts? How alike are you and your spouse when it comes to resolving...

#73: When Life Becomes Undone

#73: When Life Becomes Undone

Have you ever felt as though you’ve gotten “the short end of the stick?" Has there been loss, sickness, tragedy or injustice in your...

Being Sexy Has Nothing To Do With Your Body

Being Sexy Has Nothing To Do With Your Body

When I talk to women about sex in marriage, one of the most common concerns is their bodies. “I’m just not sexy!” Practically every woman feels like she is either too old, too fat, too flat-chested, or too plain to be sexy. We live in a world that has definite...

The Erosion of Gender and You

The Erosion of Gender and You

Over the past few decades, we’ve slowly been eroding what it means to be male and female. Recently this movement has culminated in normalizing transgenderism and the vilification of anyone who stands upon a traditional definition of male and female. Just last week,...

Why We Need to Care About Sex In the News

Why We Need to Care About Sex In the News

I am sometimes lovingly accused of being so lost in my work and family that I don’t know what is going on in the world. It’s as if the Hannah and Carrie from the Authentic Intimacy team knock on the hatch of my “submarine” to tell me about the latest trends and...

Lady Gaga and Jesus the Healer

Lady Gaga and Jesus the Healer

It is not often that I find myself in agreement with Lady Gaga and the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences, but last night was an exception. In a dramatic presentation, Lady Gaga performed Till it Happens To You as dozens of male and female victims of sexual...

Is There a Christian Version of Barbie?

Is There a Christian Version of Barbie?

This past year, Barbie has been in the news. For 57 years, this plastic woman has projected the ideal and unattainable image for American girls. The Daily Mail reported in 2013; a real-life Barbie would have “bones so frail it would be impossible to walk and would...

Pornography & Our Kids

Pornography & Our Kids

Our nation was recently appalled to discover that a city government in Flint, Michigan has been serving their citizens poisonous water for over a year. When concerns were raised, government officials gaffed them off as isolated incidents. Tragically, young children...

How To Be A Good Listener

How To Be A Good Listener

Has anyone ever told you that your ears are beautiful? Even sexy? I’ll let you in on a little secret: your ears just may be the most attractive part of your body. No, God didn’t make ears physically appealing. In fact, they seem to look the best when they blend into...

Is It Wrong to Get Plastic Surgery?

Is It Wrong to Get Plastic Surgery?

If you look in the mirror long enough, you’re going to see things you don’t like. Wrinkles, a nose that’s too big, flabby skin, and a body that is a better fit for Good Housekeeping than Vogue. Maybe you don’t have to look into the mirror to notice these things. Your...

How Do We Determine Right and Wrong?

How Do We Determine Right and Wrong?

In response to some of the posts I’ve written on issues like transgenderism and Fifty Shades of Grey, I’ve heard from women who are angry that I would present some sexual choices or lifestyles as morally wrong. Here is an example: Who are you to say that sleeping with...

How Do I Know If I’m in an Abusive Relationship?

How Do I Know If I’m in an Abusive Relationship?

On the surface, they looked like a perfect Christian couple. Always together, with his arm around her waist. Her friends would admit to feeling a bit jealous. Abby never goes anywhere without Jake; he’s so attentive. I can barely get my husband to notice that I’m in...